The Return of the Malfoy
by Soaring Pandas
Summary: Scorpius hasn't talked to Rose...well in their case yelled at her in the past three years. Then suddenly he returns. One hour of hell.


**AN: One-shot. Medium length; 2,000 words. You may find this funny or you may not. Warning: This is NOT a Scorrose romance fic. Enjoy!**

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_Scene: The Return of the Malfoy (Key word here; 'the'. It's not even a being)_

_Personal thoughts: His fake hair looks hilarious next to his bright red tomato face, haha wait that's directed at me. To be continued…._

"Well, today dear class of spoilt teenagers I have a treat for you," my old, gruff looking professor revealed in a rather nonchalant tone, "you'll be competing in pairs and the winning pair will get my old potion recipe book." Evidently unenthusiastic shouts of excitement lingered in the air seconds too long.

Professor Globkins waved his hand clearly unaffected by the show of disregarded to his generous and pleasing gift, "Now you better remember your numbers or your working alone."

I secretly had my 'fingers crossed', as the muggles would say, to end up with Lysander Scamander. Well, in the pair work of course even though the bigger picture would be to eventually _end up_ with him. The blonde sat a few rows up ahead of me next to his twin brother. I, Rose Weasley, secluded myself to the corner of the room.

"Hey Rosie," my cousin Lucy called out to me, "I heard Scamander, Lysander that is likes someone." She left me hanging, that's just like her. She knew my breath was caught in my throat right about now and she wouldn't respond, way to throw an exploding bomb. Even though I hate to admit it I do consider myself a goody little two shoes but only in classes and at other times I can give James a run for his money.

Tilting my head slightly to the right so I could barely see her through the corner of my eye I whispered back, "Speak you little spawn of the devil." Oh, that signature Lucy smirk.

"Sorry to burst your bubble cuz but people say it's Kelly, you now Kelly Thomas. I beg to differ, I've seen the way he looks at you and as many times as you may deny it you know it in your gut too, he likes yoouu." She said the last part in a sing-song voice.

I scoffed at my terrible judgement, "I also thought Hugo was gay."

"I'll have to be honest that wasn't your best shot but," she trailed off as a little light bulb flicked over her head, "AHA, you just admitted that you know he likes you."

My eyebrow could have knocked the ceiling off this place, "I doubt my brother's sexual orientation is me admitting to that."

"Noo, Rosie, don't ruin my eureka moment with your over analytical and quite frankly cynical view on everything."

"I'm not cynical!" my voice rose a pitch too high.

She gave me a grin of a little mischievous pixie, "Yeah, whatever floats your boat little Rosie."

I rolled my eyes at her but she had evaded my mockery in a matter of ego saving seconds by turning her head. How could Lysander possibly like _me?_ Plain old Rose Weasley, who apart from a few play dates has never spoken to. I caught his _very _toned figure from the corner of my eyes, God he was addicting. Thankfully Professor Globkins' voice had made its way into my head to stop me of making a fool out of myself. "Alright you may get to work."

Rewind old dimwit, how could I possibly work without knowing my partner. Oh no Rosie, you let him distract you again! This isn't the first time something like this had happened due to a specific addiction to a certain Scamander twin. Now I didn't even know where the hell I belonged. Maybe it is to hell for getting distracted by his gorgeous self. I looked around fanatically hoping someone would come and claim me. I watched as Lysander got up and headed in my direction. My breath hitched in my throat and I truly was going to pass out, until he shot an intoxicating grin towards my cousin. She return his offer and shot me an apologetic look whilst I just smiled back to tell her it was fine.

Wait, so who w_as_ my partner? Rewinding back a few seconds I probably shouldn't have asked that as Scorpius Malfoy pulled up Finn's abandoned chair right next to me with the very friendly remark of, "Stop gaping like a fish, Weasley."

"I'm just preparing myself for when Globkins tells us we failed because someone lacked mature brains in our group." I snarled back. I truly didn't know Scorpius Malfoy aside from a few tirade encounters in our first and second years. After that we hadn't really spoken or in our case yelled at each other. Over time I had forgotten that he existed apart from when he'd pop up in one of my classes or laughed too loudly in the corridors with those rentable friends of his. Malfoy couldn't possibly have actual friends. Think about it who would go in the near vicinity of _that _if it wasn't profitable.

He rolled his eyes, "Glad you're out of the denial zone."

"I meant you, you prat. And what denial zone are you raving about, _Malfoy_?" the venom currently exiting body via my mouth must have been a result of fighting with Finn which I had managed to bottle up because I couldn't have that much hate towards someone I hadn't spoken to for three years.

Now that I remember those few memorable encounters, I guess I could. "You know how you believe you're the next Merlin or Rowena Ravenclaw, nothing more really. Unless you want to enlighten me on other false thing in your life, possibly staring with your hair?" he raised his eyebrow and just scoffed.

"My hair is fake? How about yours, because the last I heard albinos weren't supposed to have golden hair."

Malfoy still had that amused expression on his face like he was watching a child speak nonsense. "Golden Weasley? That's a pretty godly colour. I would have liked it better than blonde which is what I think of my hair. Have anything else to confess Weasley, a little crush perhaps?"

"If you're suggesting I fancy you Malfoy then that seeping hair dye really must have done a number on your scarce brain cells. Considering I'd much rather fancy a Hippogriff than yourself. At least they have nice feathers and are more interesting than I can say about you." I replied in a nonchalant tone due to the severe boredom this conversation had caused me.

He held a hand over his heart, drama queen alert, "That really hurt my feelings. I always wanted to be half horse with pretty feathers but sadly I turned out human. At least one of us got the wish, Weasley, isn't that fantastic!"

"You arrogant, narcissistic, conceited, self-loving—" before I could leave him marvel at the amount of synonyms I knew for one word he had stopped me with his annoying voice.

"As much fun as it is listening to your colourful words I'd much rather do the work and that's saying something." I gave his one last snarky look before we started working.

We mostly worked in silence, well I worked he just sat there reading instructions. It was going as fine as it could with Malfoy until half way through my potion had emitted a black poof instead of the triumphant navy blue shade the book mentions.

"Look what you've done!" I screamed hysterically.

"Me, You're the one cooking it."

It took all my willpower not to throttle him, "Firstly, you just admitted to not doing anything on the project and secondly you're the one reading the ingredients, I'm just following what you said!" Then I snatched the book out of his hands and read the recipe for the memory potion over again, "It's says two Jobberknoll feathers not twelve, you idiot." It then became apparent as to why Professor Globkins had given us a skeptical expression when we told her we our five feathers wouldn't be enough.

"Oh, that would make more sense. I've never heard of more than five feathers in a potion anyway." My eye twitched as I stepped forward only to be held back. I turned around to see none other than Finn Corner, the previously mentioned best friend I was fighting with.

"He's not worth it, Rose." He muttered not quiet looking me in the eyes. It has been exactly a month and fourteen days in which we had not spoken and for that to be our first word is heartbreaking and angering. I just missed him so much and I cannot believe how we had started this fight or period of disregard to each other.

Malfoy just scoffed in the background, but I was too busy trying to catch the eye of my best friend to care or to notice who had joined us. Why couldn't anyone just throw me in the cauldron, maybe the potion will have an opposite effect when touching the body and will make me forget the crap that's been thrown at me this past half hour with Malfoy.

"Rosie," I recognized Lucy's voice as she tried to snap my vision away from a very awkward Finn. I should have said I was sorry rather than just stare at him as he clearly tried to avoid my eye.

"Don't disturb them little Weasley. Isn't this display of the reversible roles of the muggle classic 'Beauty and the Beast' just soo touching?" I almost punched him when he feigned tearing.

"Rose." Lucy's voice was more terse and forceful this time that I had to look away.

"Gay, are you Malfoy?" I shot back to the statement that seemed to have been made centuries ago. He just snorted, _how charming. _

I moved away then, toward Malfoy who was looking far too relaxed for his own good. He ought to be running away. I took out my wand and pointed it to the cauldron before he could make some comeback at how I couldn't hex him even if I tried. Emptying out the continents, I harshly yanked the book out of Malfoy's grasp and redid the potion. I was so fed up I had given up on attempting to make him work. Not so fed up that when he had pulled out one repartee about Finn, I hexed him. Or attempted to because he just counteracted and the result was a streak of red and blue light into the cauldron.

Needless to say, it exploded. I wasn't able to redo it because we were sentenced a detention. My yell of Malfoy was nearly as loud as Haley Creevey's shriek and that wasn't nearly as irritating and loud as Professor Globkins yelling at our imprudence.

The rest of the class went by uneventfully if you don't count Alexa Longbottom and Fenver County's (weird name if you ask me but not nearly as weird as Scorpius Malfoy) victorious snogging session. That also ended badly when her father, Neville Longbottom had hexed Fenver. A professor hexing a student, now that was a sight to see!

The judging and declaration of the winner had occurred three minutes before class ended which gave me time to express how I felt about Fenver's name to Malfoy who looked like he'd enjoy plucking his eyeballs out more than listen to my rant up until I expressed my feelings towards his name.

"It is rather funny," I told him, "Fenver, what were his parents thinking when they named him?"

"Who knows what goes on in the ludicrous minds of muggles." It was his first interjection throughout the entire conversation. I rolled my eyes at him.

"Sounds like a mouth disease," I continued undisturbed, "maybe it's not contagious. I'm sorry but you seem to be infected with Fenveritis." I laughed at my own impression of a healer, "You know what does sound contagious? Scorpius Malfoy." I snorted unaware of a livid Malfoy face turning rigidly in my direction, "I'm sorry but you have Scorpiuitis at Malfoy level and we're going to have to keep you in a few days." I cracked at that and laughed so loud even the snogging couple had stopped their sickening display of teenage hormones.

After Professor Globkins had stunned and levitated Professor Longbottom outside, the couple had continued like nothing had happened which was quiet disastrous for my eyes and inappropriate for the little first year who was helping carry the herbs into the class with the aforementioned fuming professor and probably thought Fenver was trying to help Alexa get something out of her mouth in a very saliva wasting way.

"I wouldn't want to have Scorpiuitis at Malf—" I stopped my subconscious insults as Malfoy himself was completely turned in my direction, "What?" I asked dumbfounded. No, Rose, dumb doesn't work in Malfoy situations!

"Stupefy!" was his response. He never did give me what I wanted three years ago so why should he start now?

What a dandy hour with a fabulous Malfoy! Please, do not overlook the sarcasm dripping down to the next line.

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**Reviews are always welcome :)**

**A part of this got deleted so I just had to try to remember what it said first but I think the first version was better :S Plus the published the wrong one at first, sorry!**


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